I spent the better part of Tuesday this week with family
remembering one of my favorite relatives, my Uncle Felix, who passed away from
renal failure a month before his 73rd birthday. The event program
declared the occasion was a Celebration of Life, and I heartily agree with that
sentiment.
On the first Thursday of the New Year I went to visit my
Uncle in the hospice care facility he was at. I’d been warned by my mom who had
seen him the week before that he wasn’t physically the man I’d remembered, and
that his once-hefty frame was now pretty much skin and bones. I still went to
visit him anyway, knowing that it was the right thing to do after all the times
he was such a generous host and chauffeur all the times I went to visit them
and wanted to have fun in the summer time with their son Nathan at places like
Valleyfair, the State Fair, racing go-karts and the old Science Museum, to name
a few.
Even though the pain meds kept him very sedated and lymphoma
had taken his eyesight, I still took comfort in getting to see Uncle Felix one
last time, thanking him for all the great memories over the years. He was an
avid fisherman, and would spend many a nice spring or summer day at the lake
with us in Cold Spring. He kept almost every fish he caught, and I vaguely
remember that he even had some kind of silly sing-song kind of lyric that he’d
say to our cats who would curiously peer into his fish bucket, hoping anxiously
for a treat. Fishing just won’t be the same without him!
The Monday morning after my visit, I was on my way out the
door for the day when I answered the phone to find my Aunt Maryann, Felix’s
wife, calling. She called to inform us that Felix had passed away quietly the night
before. I knew that this ordeal was very rough on her, but I was happy that the
tone of her voice suggested that she’d accepted the fact and made peace with
it. She told me that the services would be the following week, because some of
the relatives from out of state wanted to attend and would be making the long drive to Minnesota.
Last Sunday, Aunt Maryann called again, and asked me to be
one of the pallbearers at the ceremony. I was honored to do so, and instantly
accepted. I thought it would be a great way to pay my respects to a favorite
uncle.
After arriving at the church and some last minute-tinkering
with my dress suit, I started meeting other relatives on Mom’s side of the
family. Felix and Maryann’s daughter Libby was coordinating the music program,
and informed me that I’d also be doing one of the readings during the ceremony,
along with my cousin Marge. I was surprised, but still accepted this new
responsibility without problem. That’s what I got for not checking my emails
the night before, I guess!
As people filed into the church hall, I got to catch up with
a few family members, some that I’d just talked to earlier in the week, and
others that I hadn’t seen in years. Eventually, I took my place in the front
row, sandwiched between my Uncle Rudy (of all of Grandma Haider’s ten children,
she always used to say that she prayed for Rudy the most) and my cousin Libby.
Some of the musicians Libby has performed with from time to time were playing the
opening song, and would accompany her later in the morning. Another friend of
hers, contemporary and gospel singer Robert Robinson, also lent his remarkable
voice to a few selections.
I made it through my Bible reading without flubbing my lines
or tripping once I left the podium, and was then able to relax and enjoy the songs
and remembrances of Uncle Felix. One of his relatives relayed a fishing story
that my Mom later realized might have been during one of Felix’s many trips to
Cold Spring, a somewhat embarrassing tale of a fish that might just have been
caught out of season!
Returning to the church for conversation and good food
afterwards, Libby brought out Uncle Felix’s “RIBS TODAY” sign into the lobby.
Felix was a great cook, and get-togethers where he made his famous barbeque
ribs were always memorable! He used to go around to various locations in the Twin Cities selling his ribs during his retirement, hence the sign. In his honor, I sampled a few ribs from the buffet
table, filling my plate before sitting down to reminisce with family members.
Before long, it was time to go. I’d wished I had more time
to catch up with some more family members and some of Felix’s friends,
especially Felix and Maryann’s son Nathan, who I hadn’t seen in probably fifteen
years, but I figured I would get in touch with them again once their lives were
back to normal.
